


Bear With Me

by IntoBeyondDarkness



Series: Fixing the Madagascar Timeline [2]
Category: Madagascar (Movies)
Genre: Acceptance, Bullying, F/M, Falling In Love, Gen, Humor, Love, Love Triangles, Movie Spoilers, Suggestive Themes, Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-12-27
Updated: 2013-12-27
Packaged: 2018-01-06 08:14:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 10
Words: 14,980
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1104523
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/IntoBeyondDarkness/pseuds/IntoBeyondDarkness
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A Madagascar 3: Europe's Most Wanted fic. Skipper and Julien have the same huge problem, and the young Private is just trying to survive.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Beginning in the Middle

"…we're gonna need an aerial view, eye's in the skies, I want to know everything that goes on in these parts." Skipper paced in front of his team. The leader paused in front of Kowalski who was writing thing's down in a notebook. "If a puffin lays a pellet, I want to know about it. Am I understood?"

"Yes, sir." saluted Kowalski.

"We need a private's eye…" continued Skipper. "Someone who can look two places at once, even more!"

While the leader spoke, the smallest penguin named Private was playing with his eyes. He was naturally cross-eyed. When he was bored or just for fun, he'd try to straighten them out. He did, and was now focused fully on Skipper.

"We need—" Skipper narrowed his eyes. "Private, what's with the googly eyes?!" The leader jumped in front of the private and stared into the small penguin's eyes. They looked weird to him. They were staring right at him, possibly through him. Private's crossed eyes always looked past him, not through him. Penguins weren't transparent and that didn't fly with him. "You eyeing me, soldier?"

"No, Skipper." answered Private.

"What are you looking at?"

"You, sir." Private chirped.

"Don't you look at me when I'm talking to you!" Skipper ordered. "How do I know your head's not some sort of wacked out control center?"

"Skipper, sir?" Kowalski called his commander.

"…one with heat seeking enemy missiles? Do I look  _hot_  to you?" Skipper eyed private suspiciously, leaning into the small penguin's face.

"Sir, permission to speak?" asked Kowalski.

"Granted." grinned the skipper.

"We may be being watched." Kowalski stated.

"Hoover Dam! I knew it!" Skipper cried. He grabbed Private by his feathers and hoisted him into the air. "Who are you working for!?"

"It isn't the private, sir." Kowalski told him.

Skipper threw Private on the ground, starting to look around the circus tent for spies. "Who then?"

"I believe the danger is behind you and six feet above." pointed Kowalski.

The leader turned around to be face to face with huge ghastly teeth. He jumped back and used the private who had just gotten up again as a body shield. "Danish missionaries! Deadly! They've found me, men! It's time to sacrifice your lives for your leader! Battle positions!"

"Woah!" Alex stepped back as the two tallest penguins jumped into a fighting stance in front of their leader. "No need for all the cuckoo stuff! It's just us!"

The penguins didn't stand down. They just glared hard at the lion in front of them.

"You know…? Alex, Marty, Gloria, and Melman?" tried Alex, hopefully. The lion sighed. "You know, the freaks?"

"I don't know any freaks." Skipper said, peeking his head out from behind Private's.

"Come on Skipper! We've been neighbors for years!" Alex exclaimed, taking a few steps towards them. "And we traveled like, half way around the world together!"

Kowalski and Rico hardened their stances, ready to attack the lion if necessary.

"Back up, hippie!" shouted Skipper. "You don't know who you're dealing with!"

"Of course I know who I'm  _dealing with_." said Alex.

"What's my name?" Skipper narrowed his eyes.

"Skipper."

"Oh, so you do know me." Skipper shoved Private aside and off the crate they were all standing on. "In that case, what's his name?" The leader pointed to another penguin.

"Easy, that's Kowalski, your second in command over crazy operations." answered Alex.

"What about him?" Skipper pointed again.

Alex smiled. "Good old Rico, right there."

"You're good, Rooski" The leader grinned.

"What? No, I'm not Rooski, Vitaly's Rooski."

"Who's Vitaly?" asked Skipper.

"He's the tiger..." Alex groaned at their unchanging expressions. "Oh for the love of— You guys are joking, right?"

The penguins looked at him blankly. Kowalski looked confused, Skipper was dead serious, Rico blinked and Private got up from the floor he was just thrown on for a second time. Private was just smiling without a care.

The lion laughed, thinking it was all a joke. "Good joke guys. Like you expect me to believe that none of you know anybody else's names other than your own."

Gloria looked unconvinced. "Alex, I don't think they're joking. They look pretty serious to me."

"No way!" Alex said. "I refuse to believe that none of them ever bothered to learn any of our names after all we've been through; the Central Park Zoo, Grand Central Station, Madagascar, Africa, and now we're in a circus tent in Europe. We've done way too much stuff for them just  _not_ to know our names!"

"Maybe that's it." Marty suggested.

"Maybe what's it?" asked Melman.

"Maybe we've done so much stuff that none of us ever bothered to sit down and you know, take a load off." shrugged Marty.

Melman nodded. "That makes sense."

"No, that doesn't make any sense!" exclaimed Alex. "No one is  _that_ preoccupied."

" _Ahem._ " Kowalski interrupted and got the attention of everyone in the tent. He looked to Skipper. "Permission to address the lion, sir?"

Skipper waved his flipper as a sign to go ahead. "Good idea, Kowalski.  _You_ make sense of this."

Kowalski nodded his regards, jumping down from the crate at the lion's feet. The lieutenant showed Alex a notebook.

Alex looked at the tallest penguin weird before accepting the notebook and looking at it. "Uh, what's this?"

"That is our current mission files as of the last few years." Kowalski informed him.

This enraged Skipper. "What are you doing?! That's classified business! What are you thinking, soldier?!"

"Sorry, sir. I just thought they should be informed." saluted the lieutenant.

Alex looked away from the penguins. The one who gave him the notebook was being scolded by the leader, and occasionally smacked. Skipper was saying something about double agent puffins when Alex decided to look down at the notebook. There were two lines of words written. The first line said ' _Escape and find new home'_ , but this statement had been crossed out. The second line read ' _Get hippies back to New York****'_. This line was circled in bold black with four multicolored sticker stars next to it. That was all that was on the paper.

The lion was a little surprised and once he read it over a few more times he handed it to Gloria who showed it back to Marty and Melman. The zoosters were all generally surprised at the paper.

"Wow." Alex gaped. "I don't know what to say…but back to the reason we're here right now. We were kind of wondering if you guys could drop everything you're doing and do us a huge favor—"

Gloria elbowed the lion, putting her hands on her hips.

"Ow! What?" exclaimed Alex, rubbing his sore shoulder.

"This is just great!" Skipper cried, pacing around in the tent. "Our entire operation is compromised! What are we going to tell those hippies now?! That we can't take them back to the zoo?"

Private nodded with a smile and Skipper threw his flipper back, smacking that smile right off.

"We  _will_  get our friends back to New York!" confirmed Skipper. "Even if it kills Private!"

"Perhaps that's it, sir." said Kowalski.

"Perhaps what's it?" Skipper asked the lieutenant.

Kowalski pointed to his notebook and Alex handed it over to him. The lieutenant flipped to a new page. He started jotting things down, scribbling hastily until he was satisfied. He showed his calculations to Rico who nodded with excitement. Kowalski then showed the drawings to Skipper. "Sir," nodded Kowalski to his superior.

"I could live with that." shrugged Skipper. "What say you, Private?"

Private, who was smiling once more, went up eagerly to see the new plan his superiors would soon put into place. His smile faded as he read the hastily drawn pictures further, until he was finished looking at the drawings. The youngest penguin's flippers hung limply at his sides and he looked nothing less than terrified at what he just read.

Skipper saw nothing wrong with it. He simply slung his flipper around the frightened young penguin. "I say we act on this new operation as soon as possible, and mark the private down as a flight risk. I don't trust the little rascal."

"Yes, sir." Kowalski said and continued jotting down notes.

The leader nodded with satisfaction before he noticed something. He looked up to the big animals who were staring at him. "Can we help you?"

"Uh yeah," Alex nodded. "You can, actually. We were wondering if you could go handle the whole elephant-kid issue. Now I didn't know if we should just pull him out or—"

Gloria elbowed the lion again.

"Ow!" Alex glared.

Gloria turned to Skipper. "We just wanted to say thank you for all the help you've been giving us."

"It's no problem, doll. Happy to serve you hippies in whatever it is you're doing." said Skipper.

"We'll leave you to go back to whatever it is you were doing." The hippo started pushing out her other three friends. The only one who objected was Alex.

"Wait! What about the elephant issue?" Alex demanded.

"Bye!" Marty called to the penguins.

"See you around, stripes." Skipper waved. "Later hippies!"

"Skipper—" Private started.

"Smile and wave to the hippies, boys." instructed the leader.

All the penguins did so except for Private until Alex, Gloria, Marty, and Melman had left their tent.

Skipper immediately stopped waving. His fake smile faded to annoyance. "I thought they'd never leave…" The leader sighed. "Good acting boys, and good fake mission plans Kowalski. They looked real to boot. That'll keep those freaks out of our feathers for a few more trips."

"Playing dumb," started Kowalski. "I knew it would work, sir."

"But Skipper," chirped the private, looking concerned.

"What is it Private?"

"Aren't we ever really going back to the zoo?" asked Private.

"Of course not!" Skipper told him. "We're free now. Why on earth would we ever go back to that concentration death camp?"

Private was confused. "I thought we were taking them back, Skipper."

"Kowalski, please explain the  _real_  mission plans to the private." Skipper said to his lieutenant.

"Yes, sir." Kowalski said before jumping down in front of the smallest penguin. "Operation: Make the hippies believe we are taking them back to the zoo but instead use them as a ploy to travel the world."

Skipper grinned. "The best plan we've ever enacted."

Rico nodded and pulled a stick of dynamite out of who knows where. With a crazed look he hopped down from the crates and began running in the direction the hippies went off in, out of the tent. "Kaboom! Kaboom! Ehehehehe!"

"Woah, woah!" exclaimed Skipper and jumped in front of Rico's path. "Not yet, we still need them around." The leader then smirked and added, "For now,"

Rico looked disappointed but walked back over to the crates with his head down.

"Now that that's settled, where were we?" asked Skipper.

"Puffins, sir." said Kowalski, picking back up his pen and paper.

"Right." Skipper nodded and began pacing in front of his soldiers, picking back up from when they were interrupted. "If a puffin makes a pellet, I want to know about it—"

"Do you know a puffin, Skipper?" asked Private.

"I did." Skipper answered coolly.

"Were you two friends then?"

Skipper smiled. "The best of!"

Private smiled back. "Where is he now?"

"Oh, he's dead." answered Skipper simply. "I killed him back in '99."

The private's face fell. "I thought you said he was your friend, Skipper."

"Oh Private, I kill all my friends!" Skipper laughed. "It's only always a matter of time before when." The leader clapped him on the back and went back to the meeting about evading Dubois.

The private didn't listen to what his leader was saying or what Kowalski was calculating. Private noticed a piece of paper not far off from the lieutenant's feet. It was the plans that had scared him before, the one that both Skipper and Kowalski agreed to. The smallest penguin picked it up without anyone noticing and looked it over again. It showed all four penguins standing there like normal. The only difference was that he, the private, was crossed out of the picture.


	2. Anticipating a Circus

"So…how far are we on the whole penguins building spaceship operation?" Skipper asked.

Kowalski looked up from his notes after doing some configurations. "About six to nine thousand years, sir."

"Very funny, Kowalski. You really had me. I thought you said  _six to nine thousand years_. Ha!" The leader laughed.

"That is correct, Skipper. I did indeed say six to nine thousand years." Kowalski confirmed.

"Oh." Skipper blinked and rubbed the feathers on the back of his neck. "How old are we?"

"Four years, sir." answered the lieutenant.

"Right…" Skipper nodded. "…And you're  _sure_  you can do math?"

Kowalski shrugged.

"Huh…" blinked Skipper. "Maybe we  _should_ you know, send Private to college then."

Kowalski frowned and narrowed his eyes. The thought of that little penguin going to school to learn made the lieutenant feel a bit of rage inside. "Perhaps I could be the one to go to college, sir. I could enhance my knowledge far more than the private could, respectfully speaking."

"Oh Kowalski!" Skipper sighed and placed a flipper on his lieutenant's shoulder. "You had your chance! Don't you remember? The whole dolphin incident! It was front page news all over the campus! I smacked you for days after that, was so angry at your little sorry tail feathers. Rico had to smack  _me_ to get me off of you."

"She only ever liked me for my body, sir." Kowalski admitted. "But my heart has gone on and I am over her now."

"No you're not."

"Am too, sir."

"Are not!" Skipper retorted.

"Skipper, I would like to file a request that you take that back."

"Request denied."

"Sir-"

"Kowalski!" Skipper interrupted. "Look at the private over there! Look at that little sickening bucket of optimism and feminine products! Don't you see him?"

Kowalski blinked in the direction his commander was referring to. "Target identified, sir. I have spotted the private." The lieutenant stated, looking over at Private and Rico on the other side of the circus tent. Rico was coughing up as much dynamite as he could and it looked like Private was trying to speak to him, though Rico was obviously far more interested in whatever he was doing with his dynamite. Kowalski looked back to Skipper. "Do I take him out now, sir?"

"Nope." answered Skipper. "No need to take action now. That little scamp is going to make an excellent commander one day, sure to replace me in my leave. But look at him over there! Who knows what goes on in that crazed mind of his? For all I know he could be plotting my downfall…" the leader shook his head, watching the private pathetically trip over one of Rico's sticks of dynamite. "He's a mastermind, Kowalski…" Skipper said with narrowed and suspecting eyes. "A real double agent assassin…Do you see how much he pays attention to me when I talk? I can tell he's out for my blood! Can't you?"

Kowalski watched as the private climbed back on to the crate he fell off of, only to slip and roll on another stick of dynamite and land in a pile on the ground. The lieutenant nodded. "He certainly is a menace, sir."

"Keep an eye on him, Kowalski. He's planning  _something_ …"

"Yes, sir." The lieutenant saluted and picked up his notebook and crayon, jotting things down.

The leader narrowed his eyes, watching the private. "…I just don't know  _what_ …"

* * *

"Oh no…Oh no, Rico, he's looking at me, he's watching me! He suspects something, I just know it!" Private hid behind the crate, shaking in fear. "He knows I know…He knows I know what he's planning! Oh Rico, what am I going to do?" asked the private.

Rico blinked and continued making his tower of dynamite. He hopped on and off the crates, stacking the dynamite sticks and going down to get more to stack higher. The crazed penguin hummed brokenly while he worked, in his prime while making his beautiful tower.

"You'd protect me, wouldn't you Rico? You won't let them hurt me?" Private asked hopefully, smiling to his teammate. The small penguin tried getting the other's attention anyway he could but Rico was too focused on finishing his tower to reply to him. "Rico?" chirped the private, starting to frown. Private pulled on Rico's flipper but the penguin pushed him off and continued on with the dynamite. Private sighed and looked down at his feet. Would no one help a poor little penguin live? He guessed not…

Private sighed again and started waddling forward when he hit something solid and fell back on his tail. "Oof!" The air was knocked out of him and he looked up to see a giant. "AHHHH!" He screamed in terror. Was this the plan? Skipper called in giants to step on him? How could anyone do this to him? What did he do wrong? He thought he was a good enough soldier! Wasn't he? Private started crying in a ball on the ground, covering his eyes so he wouldn't have to see it all coming…

"Hey!" Alex exclaimed as he almost stepped on a small black and white domino. It was only when he looked down that he saw it was a penguin. Then the penguin fell backwards and started rocking back and forth. It looked like it was having a sort of breakdown or something. The lion raised a brow and bent down to see the little penguin better. He squinted his eyes, seeing the tiny penguin peak at him behind two flippers concealing its eyes. "It's Private, right?"

"W-what?" Private sniffed, looking up.

"Out of the four penguins," said Alex. "You're the one I  _think_  I heard them call Private."

"Y-yeah…" nodded the small penguin. "A-and you're the psychotic lion Skipper doesn't l-like." Private identified the lion.

"Uh…no, actually the name's Alex…and what about Skipper now?" Alex asked, giving a claw for the penguin to grab.

"N-never mind." Private shook his head, taking the lion's claw to stand himself up. Even if the team was plotting to kill him, he'd never spill Skipper's secrets. "Are you here to step on me?"

The lion laughed. "No, why the heck would I do that? Do I look like I'd step on you?"

"Yes, absolutely." nodded the private.

Alex blinked at the answer. "Well don't worry, I won't."

"Thank you!" Private smiled cheerily, hugging the lion's leg.

"Yeah, sure…" Alex said uncomfortably, shaking the penguin off his foot. It stared at him smiling still and the lion never told anyone because he didn't want to be mean, but this penguin was the one that freaked him out the most. It's smile was too happy and its crossed eyes were almost filled with nothing. It was like the thing didn't think on its own and followed everything anyone would say. The penguin reminded Alex of some creepy forever smiling toy! "So why are you all like that?"

"Like what?" Private blinked, still holding that cheery smile. This only creeped out the lion more.

"You know, all  _sad._ "

Private frowned at that "Oh…" Then he smiled for the umpteenth time. Maybe the nice psychotic lion could help him.

Alex stepped back cautiously as if he would catch whatever the penguin had. The lion pointed to the penguin with a shaky digit. "You're smiling again, uh, do you need a doctor or…?"

Private nodded, happy that the lion was getting the gist of it. "Yes, you see, I do need help with-"

"RA DA DA DA DA DA DA DA CIRCUS, DA DA DA DA DA DA DA DA AFRO! CIRCUS AFRO, CIRCUS AFRO, POLKA DOT POLKA DOT POLKA DOT AFRO!" Marty interrupted, painted up and wearing a rainbow wig. The zebra kept on dancing, humming the tune to the song he just made up with his eyes closed.

"Really?" Alex sighed. "Marty, would you quit fooling around? These animals have a show to do and you're just distracting them with…" The lion trailed off, looking the zebra up and down. "…whatever it is you've put together here."

Gloria crossed her arms. "Oh Alex, why don't you just let Marty have a little fun huh?"

Melman agreed with his girlfriend. "Yeah, you've been a stick in the mud ever since we left Africa. What's your problem?"

"Look guys, I'm just trying to get us back to the zoo!" Alex told them. "I'm a little stressed out right now, so if you would please stay out of these animals way that'd be kind of nice!"

Gloria glared. "Well you don't have to be  _so_ darn stu-"

"Sonya!" Stefano called. "Where is the bear-a? Sonya!" The sea lion looked around the tent frantically for the female bear. She was nowhere to be found.

"I agree with the lion over there," Skipper glared, hopping down from a crate. "Not the seal, but the lion." The leader penguin clarified.

"I am a sea-a lion!" corrected Stefano crossly.

Skipper looked at the sea lion. "Don't you have a bear to be looking for?"

Stefano's eyes widened and he ran off. "…Sonya! Where-a are you?!"

Skipper rolled his eyes and turned his attention back to the hippies. " _Anyway_ , where was I?"

"You were agreeing with me." Alex informed him.

"Oh yeah," The leader nodded. "Well I do, and you know why?"

Private was about to answer but got slapped in the face by Skipper. The small penguin frowned and stayed quiet, rubbing his cheek.

Alex shrugged at the penguin's question, Marty and Melman blinked, and Gloria just stared with her hand on her big hips.

"Ask why!" ordered Skipper.

Alex elbowed the zebra in the chest to answer the crazy penguin.

Marty blinked his response. "Uh, why?"

"Because  _SOME_  penguins are trying to work and can't concentrate with all your YAPPITY YAP!" shouted Skipper. "Now clear out of here! Don't you freaks have a circus to own? We're busy with our own operations! We can't be bothered handling yours too! What do we look like to you? Tiny lawyers?!"

"You kinda do!" Marty answered.

"Well we're not!" Skipper started ushering them all out along with his lieutenant.

Kowalski used light up handheld plane signals to direct the large animals out of the recreational tent.

"So go! Go out there and see that circus through!" ordered Skipper. "And while you're doing that, we'll finish working out the celebration plans for when we're all back at the zoo!"

"Thanks," Alex smiled as he left the tent. "You guys are the best!"

"Don't mention it!" smiled Skipper. The leader penguin held his smile for a little bit longer before they were gone and he let it fall completely. He shook his head. "Stupid hippies," Skipper sighed in dismay and then shouted over to his lieutenant. "Kowalski! Where do we stand?"

Kowalski saluted. "Operation: Sabotage the circus, is a go sir! Whenever you're ready."

"Execute!" Skipper grinned. "And make it funny!"

"Like a zebra in a wig, sir?" asked Kowalski.

_"Just like a zebra in a wig._ " Skipper repeated, nodding with a smug grin.


	3. Whacked Out Circus

"Sonya! Where is the bear-a?" called Stefano over and over again. The sea lion ran back and forth frantically searching for the bear with no luck. Perhaps he'd have some if he looked around normally and not jumping or running back and forth with some kind of instrument over his head.

Skipper rubbed his temples with his wingtips, groaning. "Would someone shut him up?!"

Rico nodded to the leader before sticking his flipper out, nailing the sea lion in the pressure point on its neck.

"…Sonya! We are about to go o-" Stefano hit the floor flat on his face, the horn instrument crashing to the ground when it fell out of his limp arms.

"Ah, the sweet sound of silence." The leader penguin sighed in bliss, wrapping a wing around his private. "Don't you hear it?"

Private shook his head, smiling. "No, Skipper."

"Well that's the point." Skipper grinned.

"What's the point, sir?" asked the private, clueless.

Skipper frowned, narrowing his eyes. "I don't like you…"

"Alright guys!" Alex walked in the tent. "Blow me away! It's time to get this show on the- Hey, what happened to Stefano?" The lion pointed at the ground, concerned.

Skipper blinked, looking back at the unconscious sea lion and back at the lion standing in front of him. The leader grinned sheepishly. "Oh him? He's just…uh…"

"Praying, sir." Kowalski helped out.

"Right!" Skipper nodded, picking up the lie. "Seal wanted to get in his Hail Mary's before the big show. Good for him, right? It's always good to pray to your own personal god before doing…well, anything! And you're disturbing the poor seal here with your barging in on him all the time! You're really starting to  _tick_  that seal off and you don't want to make a penguin-"

"A seal, sir." Kowalski corrected.

"Right, a seal! You don't want to make a seal mad! So stop barging!" shouted Skipper.

"Alright, jeez, I'm sorry." Alex apologized. "I didn't mean to-"

"Yeah, yeah! Just get this show started, would ya?" Skipper glared.

Alex blinked at the outburst and the penguin took it all back with a fake laugh.

"I got you, didn't I?" chuckled Skipper. "Nah, I was just kidding. Go scrape up your friend and let's get this show started!"

Alex smiled, reassured he picked up Stefano and headed out to go start the circus. As soon as the lion was gone Skipper growled and kicked the broken horns on the instrument. They made an awful dying noise at the abuse.

"Ugh, this is driving me insane! How long do we have to keep going on like this?" Skipper asked with a groan.

Kowalski looked down at his notebook. "6-9 days, sir."

"Great…" The leader grunted. "Just what I need. 6-9 days of liking hippies…"

"But you don't really like them, sir." Private reminded the leader. "You're pretending to like them, like you're pretending not to like me."

Skipper narrowed his eyes again. "Right…pretending…Isn't that funny, Kowalski? The private here thinks I'm pretending."

Kowalski nodded. "Hilarious, sir."

* * *

The four penguins watched up on the beams at the train wreck of a circus down below. They didn't know what the people were so freaked out about. This was all really entertaining to them.

Then came the best part! The kid getting stuck up the elephant's-

Skipper laughed. "Well THAT was worth the price of admission." The leader smiled unfazed and ate some more popcorn.

Rico watched on with glee, being the most thrilled with the performance out of anyone. Kowalski observed the scene below them with an unchanging expression, nodding in agreement at the leader's previous comment.

Private just looked horrified, turning to his leader with much question. "Sir, I'm not sure I understood that last bit."

"It's a voluptuous thing," Skipper shrugged, and ate more popcorn. "You wouldn't get it."

Kowalski blushed visibly at the statement and word given.

Private blinked and turned back to watch the rest of the show. "You're probably right." The private nodded and leaned over to take some popcorn. He was denied the right by Skipper's flipper slapping him away.

Skipper spoke with his mouthful, his voice sounding muffled. "Of course I'm right! What do you think this is?" The leader swallowed and spoke clearly again. "A hippie fest? We can't all be right! Only the leader is right!" Skipper nodded. "Show him the numbers, Kowalski."

Kowalski nodded and showed the private a poorly made circle graph. It was multicolored and showed all four penguins averages of being right. Private had second place at about 33% and his section was yellow with his face sketched on it, Rico came in at about 15% oddly enough and his was shaded green with his face sketched on it too, Kowalski had the highest percentage by far at 50% and his was the color red with his face sketched as well, and last came Skipper at about 2% and his was blue with his face sketched on it except his face had a pathetic frown.

Skipper didn't look pleased at the calculations given. Eyes narrowed he glared at his lieutenant. "Great, now show him the EDITED numbers." ordered the skipper impatiently.

"Yes, sir." Kowalski nodded again and flipped the page, turning the notepad around to show the second circle graph. This one was the exact opposite of the previous calculations. On this graph, the whole this was shaded blue with a sketch of Skipper's grinning face on it. The other three penguins weren't even present on the graph since their leader came in at 100% on it. But in the background of the large circle, there was a sketch of the three 'always wrong' penguins frowning in failure.

Skipper nodded in satisfaction. "Beautiful numbers, Kowalski."

"Skipper, I think the show's over." Private commented, pointed at the stands of people storming out.

"Well that was a bust, eh boys?" The leader asked and the other three penguins nodded with him. Skipper rolled his eyes, shaking his head as the sea lion tried to call all the people back. They just kept leaving and so the show was over. Skipper laughed at the look on the hippies' faces. "I say it's high time we laid low for a while before that psychotic lion has a heart attack and we have to help him. Just in case it happens, we won't have to help if we didn't see anything."

"Brilliant logic, sir." Kowalski congratulated.

Skipper nodded and turned to leave but the private pulled him back.

"Sir, I believe Alex is looking for you." Private pointed down at the lion that was calling and searching for the penguins around the big top.

"Drat! That hippie probably wants to dump this stupid circus ordeal now that he's seen all of what it has to really offer him and rest of those hippies! Which is nada! They're going to ask that we use the rest of the dough to buy another plane! We can't have them finding us and blowing our operation!" exclaimed Skipper. "Kowalski! Quick! Spend the last of the money on something ridiculous!" The leader ordered, shoving a sack full of money at his lieutenant.

Kowalski blinked at the request, but followed orders nonetheless. "Like on gold teeth, sir?"

"Perfect!" Skipper grinned. "And not such a bad idea! With those I bet I could eat apples!"

Private frowned. "But you don't like apples, Skipper."

"Yeah, but the hippies don't know that!" Skipper scoffed. "Now, execute and start hiding!"


	4. Stinky Surprises

~M~

"What are you all just standing around for?!" The leader demanded. "Hide, hide, hide! What do you think all that hide and seek training was for? My captivating looks?"

"You look lovely, sir." The private cut in.

Kowalski nodded. "Simply stunning."

Rico nodded vigorously in agreement.

Skipper shook his head. "You're _still_  a couple of suck ups."

"Of course." Private nodded in agreement.

"Relentlessly, sir." Kowalski said.

"Just get in the  _crates_ , huh?" The leader sighed, pointing to the empty wooden boxes in the corner of one of the train carts.

Kowalski saluted before doing a flawless cartwheel flip up into an open crate. Rico gave their leader a lift up into the box before grabbing Skipper's flipper to get himself up as well. The private was last to get into the box. It took him far longer than the others because not only was he less experienced and the shortest but he wasn't that great a climber so he just hung by his flippers, trying to hopelessly kick his legs.

"Unknown footsteps incoming, sir." Kowalski warned.

"Hoist up the private and seal this package!" Skipper ordered.

The analyst and the psycho penguin each grabbed onto one of Private's flippers to pull him up into the box. The leader picked up the discarded lid from the side and slammed the crate closed with them inside of it. All was quiet as the footsteps got closer. There was a shuffling inside the crate as the four penguins tried to get comfortable, some more sounds of shifting and then more silence.

Finally Skipper's voice was heard from inside the crate with uncertainty in it. "Well, this is Grade A Bores-ville."

"Might I recommend a game of go fish?" Kowalski asked from inside the box.

"Nah." Skipper declined. "Besides, Private's a cheater anyway."

Private's voice responded now. "But I don't know how to play, Skipper."

"That's what they always say and the next thing you know you're bathing in hot oil and Bisquick."

"What does the penguin credo have anything to do with card games?" Private asked.

The leader grumbled under his breath and a loud smack was heard. Then there was more shuffling inside the box and bored silence.

"I thought you said you heard someone coming." Skipper said after a while.

"Affirmative, sir. It should be any moment now." Kowalski replied.

There was the sound of someone shifting around and the private whined. "Skipper, I have to go."

"Would someone smack him please?" Skipper asked. There was another loud distinctive smack heard. "Thanks."

"Gasp!" Kowalski exclaimed the word. "Someone's entering the train car, sir!"

"Everybody quiet!" Skipper ordered and there was another silence. After a few seconds, a third slap rung through the air.

"What was that for, sir?" Private asked, in pain.

"Huh? Thought I saw a fly." Skipper answered too quickly.

Private sounded confused. "But there's no light in here…how could you see a-"

The train car doors were slid open with the sound of resisting old wood. There was a ferocious growl as something heavy climbed up into the circus train.

"Wasn't that fun, my hairy queen?" King Julien XIII asked, petting the thick fur on his girlfriend's fat arm.

Sonya roared in response to the skinny lemur.

"I was thinking…" Julien started. "This night doesn't have to be ending, you know...hehe, yes. We could be doing much more fun things…" the lemur said suggestively and leant forward to place a kiss on the bear's mouth. He never got a chance however as suddenly there was a rumbling inside a nearby crate. He looked towards the box in confusion. "Huh, what's that now?"

Four penguins burst out of the wooden box, three of them gasping for air and the second tallest one had his neutral crazy look, implying he was the one who let one loose.

"Oh Mother MacArthur, it burns!" Skipper exclaimed, kneeling on the ground.

Kowalski fanned the stench away from his nose holes. "It's best not to breathe through the mouth at this time."

Private opened his beak. "Why no-" the small penguin let out a feminine scream before collapsing on the floor, choking.

Skipper looked down at the fallen soldier. "Analysis, Kowalski?"

"The private is down, sir."

The leader nodded and handed the lieutenant a shovel from out of nowhere. "Make it look an accident, and uh, if you can, frame the lion."

Kowalski saluted and began dragging the private's body towards the open train cart doors.

"What were you doing in the box?" King Julien asked, blinking at the strange flightless birds.

Skipper glared at the lemur. "None of your business, and even if it was, we'd still keep it from you."

"Why's that?" the lemur asked.

"Because you didn't see anything, twinkle toes!"

"True." King Julien nodded. "I didn't, but hey, could you go over there somewhere else please? I'm a bit busy right now…" the lemur took his girlfriend's paw. "I am trying to get something going here and you  _birds_  are in a bit of the way."

"This cart has been booked under official penguin business."

"Well I got some  _business_ of my own that needs some taking care of!" King Julien argued, putting his hands on his hips, the business he was referring to. "Come on, my love." the lemur began leading the bear further into the train car.

Skipper rolled his eyes and stepped aside to let the lemur and bear pass. The king did so with his nose turning up, but as the bear went to cross the penguin leader's path, the large carnivore stopped in front of the small bird. At first the penguin was confused but as the bear came face to face with him he caught a glimpse into Sonya's eyes. The world froze for him in that moment, his beak slowly coming ajar. All he could see was the bear, that huge dazzling monster.

"Skipper, sir?" Kowalski tried and failed to get his leader's attention. He raised a brow, finding the staring between his commander and the predator very strange.

Sonya tilted her head in admiration at the small bird in front of her eyes. The tutu wearing bear was tempted and followed its instincts, taking out its huge tongue and licking it up the stubby penguin's face.

"What in the-" The penguin leader blinked as the pink appendage went back inside the bear's mouth after being run up his body.

King Julien laughed, not seeing any foul play in any of it. "Aww, my queen has chosen you as her royal chew thing! That is so nice! So what do you say, truce?" the lemur asked.

Skipper turned to look at the lemur, still completely baffled. "Huh?"

"Well we cannot be fighting when my one true love disapproves of that! I gotta keep the Mrs. Julien happy! So I the king has chosen to forgive you."

The leader narrowed his eyes as the lemur grabbed his flipper and started to shake it. "Yeah, sure…whatever…"

Julien hopped on the bear's back and pat her on the back to get her attention. "Come along, my love. We will find us a better train car. One that doesn't smell like penguin bottom."

Sonya seemed to listen to the lemur because she stepped back from the penguin, looking at him one last time before jumping down from the open train door.

The train hadn't left Rome yet, and the show had ended not fifteen minutes ago with its outstanding amount of disappointment in performance. Really though, the show was god-awful. Skipper found himself staring after the odd mammal couple, but it wasn't the lemur he was thinking about. He ended up following them out of the train and to the circus tents. He just couldn't wrap his mind around it. He knew he saw the falling in love montage and everything, but did that bear seriously just wink at him?

"Skipper, sir!" Kowalski called, having followed their leader and led the rest of the team to the tent.

"Uh, progress report?" the leader turned.

"Private disposal mission aborted, Skipper. We've been spotted." Kowalski informed, pointing to the Zooster hippies that just saw them enter the big top.

Alex blew into a paper bag, looking about ready to have a heart attack. His eyes were wide and he breathed in and out and in and out erratically while Marty calmly instructed him on his breathing, trying to calm him down.

Phil and Mason in the ticket seller disguise ran up with bags of money. "There's an angry mob outside and they're demanding their money back!" Mason said breathlessly.

Skipper blinked, still in his own thoughts and not focused.

"Skipper, your orders?" Kowalski rushed as everyone waited for an answer. When he didn't get one he got desperate, forgetting to be respectful and just demanded. "What do we do, sir!"

Skipper snapped out of it enough to think logically and sighed. "I think we all know the  _right_ thing to do…" He said before they all started running back to the train with the money in hopes of an easy escape from the angry humans.


	5. Not So Crate Escape

_~M~_

The angry crowd of circus goers chased the train all the way into the subway station. They shouted and march forwards, waving their fists and basically just being a really pissed off group of people. A majority of the animals had already made it onto the train. Alex had just hopped on when he looked back to see the remaining animals that hadn't. The two chimps Phil and Mason ran as fast as they could to catch up with the train and to keep away from the mob. The bags of money they were holding only succeeded in slowing them down and preventing them from getting on the train.

"C'mon!" Marty called. "Hurry up!"

Stefano is the only other one not on the train, running with his horns to get close enough to hop on. The sea lion finally got close enough but dropped his horns. He turned around to get them only to see the hoard of people trample over them. He froze in shock and sudden fear, unable to move. Alex jumped down from the train to grab the small sea lion, hoisting him over his shoulder before grabbing onto Melman's head, jumping up on the train.

"Grazi, Alice!" Stefano thanked the lion and kissed him on the cheek.

"Just throw us the money!" King Julien yelled, urging the chimps.

Phil and Mason threw the money, but threw it backwards where the bag ripped open and the money flew to the crowd that was now grabbing up as much as they could.

King Julien groaned loudly with a face palm.

* * *

_~M~_

"Great!" Skipper threw up his flippers. "Not only did we lose all the money we made but the crowd didn't even tear apart one of those stupid hippies! This is a total lose-lose situation! We didn't even lose the private for Hoover's sake! We could of AT LEAST lost Private!"

"Apologies, sir." Kowalski apologized. "I knew I should have thrown him to the crowd."

Skipper nodded. "You know that actually would have worked! Would of solved our problems right there and then!"

Sitting up against one of the crates, Private frowned deeply, mortified by what they were saying right in front of him without a care.

"They would've eaten the kid alive like a pack of bloodthirsty rampage wolves! But ah well," The leader shrugged. "Kowalski, where do we stand?"

"We are in neutral mode, Skipper." The lieutenant said.

"What? So we're doing nothing? Just standing around while our enemies get ahead?" Skipper demanded.

"Sir, we have to wait for our next move. The circus has failed like we planned and our next moves must be based on the reactions of the lion, hippo, giraffe, and zebra. Until then it is highly advised that we wait." Kowalski explained.

"Alright, fine." Skipper surrendered. He always listened to his right hand man. It was a rough cold war that dated back centuries, and even way back then the captain trusted his lieutenant's judgment. But that didn't mean that he the leader wasn't always right, because he was.

Private, as naïve as he was, still wasn't convinced that whatever his two elders were planning for him was actually real. It was a joke. Kowalski and Skipper were always such jokesters, never serious about anything! No wait…that was opposite. They were completely serious about everything. But they wouldn't hurt him, right? "Skipper? What do we do now, sir?"

"We wait, you adorable little nuisance!" Skipper pinched the small penguins cheeks hard, shaking the private's face as he cooed at him. "Look at you!"

"But Skipper…mmf…" Private muffled with the flippers pulling on his cheeks. "Won't I need a mirror for that?"

"You need a lot of things! But I look at you and you know what I see?" Skipper asked, smiling at the young cadet.

Private's blank grin was wide as he stared up at his approving leader. This was wonderful! Things were going to be okay! If he could just hear what Skipper was going to say then he could do whatever it is his leader liked over and over again and then Skipper won't feel a need to get rid of him. This was just what he needed! "What is it, sir? What do you see in me?"

Skipper was about to answer when there was a clattering and voices coming towards them.

Kowalski was in immediate alarm. "We have incoming, Skipper!"

"BACK IN THE CRATE! GO! GO! GO!" Skipper shouted.

Private frowned as he was picked up by his leader and thrown into the crate up above. His other three teammates jumped up into the box, as the leader and lieutenant sealed it shut. He needed to know what Skipper was going to say, he needed to know what his leader like about him. He needed to be seen as valuable to the team.

"Uh, Skipper?" Private called.

Skipper ignored him and smiled as he looked around the box. "Oh look! Apples!"

* * *

_~M~_

Alex, Marty, Melman, and Gloria sat exhausted in a train car. It'd been a long day. A very grueling, horrible, and stank day. They were all tired and frustrated and in complete disbelief. This was the worst thing that could have ever happened to them! Were they ever going to get home now? How? Why did they always have such bad luck? It was the zoo overlords, it just had to be. The zoo gods were angry at them for leaving and this was their punishment. They never should have left the zoo in the first place! But there was no turning back, things were already as they were and things as they were really sucked right now.

"This is a disaster!" Alex exclaimed.

Gloria sighed. "We blew all our money on a bad circus and we're not any closer to New York."

Melman frowned. "If anything, we're further away."

"We could have at least bought a circus that knew how to cirque!" Marty shouted.

The four large animals stared as a crate opened right in front of their faces. The crate opened to reveal the four penguins, three of them sipping from the same cup with four straws in it. The leader was the only one standing before them implying that he was the one who kicked open the small wooden box.

"I don't even know why we bought a circus in the first place. We had enough dough for a plane!" Skipper said.

"Are you kidding me?" Melman asked.

Gloria frowned. "You must have some money left over."

Skipper grinned and pulled out a pair of gold dentures. "I used it to buy teeth, and then I had them capped in gold. Now I can eat apples! Sadly, I discovered…I don't like apples." The penguin frowned. Hm. He wondered if that bear hated apples just as much as he did. Wait what? Why was he thinking about THAT of all things?

"No promoter is sending this circus to America." Marty complained. "It's toe up!"

"Now it all makes sense." Gloria started. "No wonder the circus master was so happy to sell."

Marty scoffed. "He was happy all right. Happy about ripping us off!"

The train door made a rattling noise all of a sudden and they everyone looked up to see the lion was gone. It was odd but no one really thought much into it.

"Where did Alex go?" Gloria asked.

Marty shrugged. "I dunno."


	6. Love's Twist

_~M~_

"I'm in." Marty shrugged after hearing his friend's plan.

Melman as always didn't look so convinced. "Where'd you pull that plan out of? And are you sure it'll even work? What if they don't want to change anything? And…" the giraffe lowered his voice down to a frightened whisper. "What about the scary tiger?"

"Melman, come on. I'm sure everything will be fine." Alex reassured. "It'll just be a suggestion and I'm sure if they don't like it they'll react respectfully, and you know, politely voice their opinions." Oh the irony of that statement!

"What do you think, Gloria?" Melman asked his girlfriend.

Gloria shrugged. "Seems okay. What's the worst that could happen from just a simple suggestion? You worry too much, sweetie. Everything will be okay." The hippo pet her boyfriend's hoof.

"And besides," Alex leaned against the train wall. "What the heck else can we do? It's not like we still have the plane."

"That's right!" Skipper cut in, hopping down from inside the crate. "We do NOT have a plane anymore and there are absolutely NO other options." The leader penguin shouted suspiciously.

The four Zoosters looked between each other at the small penguin's weird and seemingly pointless outburst.

Alex blinked. These penguins had a lot of issues. That was something he already knew. Maybe after all this was over he could repay them by getting them a therapist or something. He knew Melman had a pretty good one he could recommend. The lion looked at the penguin leader and back to the other three penguins who were sitting in the crate watching while drinking whatever from out of that drink they somehow got. Yep, he would never understand them.

The lion blinked back at the leader. "Uh, yeah, I kinda just said that but thanks for your…input…" Alex clapped his paws together as he felt the train car come to a stop, immediately throwing himself back on track. "Right! So! Let's break the news! Who's coming?"

"Alright." Marty got up and trotted over to the train car door. He'd wanted to go hang out with some of the other animals anyway.

"I could go for some fresh air." Gloria said and followed.

"I think I'm gonna do some stretches before we head off again." Melman said as he stretched out some of his long limbs with several pops.

The three Zoosters save for the lion had already gotten out of the train car.

Alex was about to close the door back when he looked back at the four little animals of black and white. He always felt awkward talking to them. "Hey, uh, you guys wanna come out? Get some air or apple juice or something?"

"Could I go, Skipper?" Private asked hopefully. "I'd much like to meet the other animals."

"Knock yourself out." Skipper said.

"Oh, thank you, sir!" The private chirped.

"No really." The leader told him. "Knock yourself out first before you meet the others. It'll really help."

Private frowned, not entirely getting how knocking himself out would help him make friends, but he trusted his leader's judgment. He agreed with a nod and scurried over to jump out the door.

Alex shrugged and slid the door closed behind them, going off to go give his announcement to the other animals.

"This is most certainly in our favor, sir. The animals will most likely refuse in violent tendencies to change tradition." Kowalski explained. "I can map out our next course of action immediately." The lieutenant gave a curt nod to his leader, and then raised a brow when he didn't get an instant response. "Skipper?"

Skipper shook his head, deep in thought. "Not yet..."

Kowalski blinked, awaiting further instruction. "Sir?"

"We wait for now, a little longer. We'll see how this goes and then act sometime later or something." The leader waved off, horribly distracted. "Got it loud and clear?"

"Yes, Skipper. If those are your orders."

"And they are, so relax and stay awhile." Skipper pushed the lieutenant down to sit next to an apple that came up to about half their size. "Have an apple."

"An apple, sir?"

"Try it, you might like it. Here use my teeth," He handed the lieutenant his gold teeth. "and now I'm outta here." Skipper saluted his team and started off for the train doors.

"Will you be back soon?" Kowalski asked, putting the teeth to the side.

The leader smirked knowingly. "If I'm lucky, no." Skipper pulled open the door with difficulty considering his size. "And, uh…help out the private one of you. I want him down and out by the time I get back."

"Ehehehehe!" Rico grinned wildly, happy about being able to take out something. Hopefully with dynamite. "Kaboom! Heh!"

"Not yet, save that for later. Mostly because I kinda want to watch that happen." Skipper grinned evilly. "Later, men."

Kowalski saluted as his leader left and the doors slid shut behind him. He looked over to his crazed teammate.

"Kaboooom?" Rico twitched holding up a stick of dynamite with a wild look in his eyes.

"No, no, give that here. Skipper said it was for later use."

"Kaboom! EHAHA!"

* * *

_~M~_

"Oh King Julien!" Mort called for the monarch, wandering through the train cars. "I promised me I'd fiiind you!"

"Mort, what are we doin?" Maurice asked annoyed.

"We are looking for King Julien and Mrs. King Julien!" Mort announced.

"Man that bear is not his Mrs.! And she's not our queen either! This is just some faze Julien's going through. We better just leave em alone, know what I'm sayin?"

Mort blinked for a second but went on anyway. "Oh Mr. and Mrs. King Julien!"

Maurice groaned and rolled his eyes. "If I help you find him, will you quit dragging me 'round the whole train?"

Mort nodded with an excited smile.

"Okay fine." Maurice sighed and started calling for the king. "Hey Julien! Where you at man?"

"Oh I found him!" Mort exclaimed, pointing at the round shadow they saw running into another train car.

"You sure? That didn't look too much like Julien to me." Maurice squinted his eyes to see better, finding that he couldn't make out the shape.

"I'm coming, King Julien! To the rescue!" Mort exclaimed and ran to the sliding doors.

"Mort, wait a minute!" The adviser warned but the tiny mouse lemur was already squeezing through the small gap in the door. He muttered under his breath, something about him being an adviser but no one ever listening to him before jogging over to the train. With an effort he pulled the doors open wider so he could squeeze in. He spotted the tiny lemur hiding behind a crate, oddly shaking. "Mort, man! Don't run off like that! What if the tiger ate up your sorry butt? And why're you all shaking like that?"

Mort turned to the aye-aye lemur with big tear-filled eyes. He started crying.

Maurice frowned, not meaning to upset the little guy. "I'm sorry 'bout that, it's just that I gotta keep an eye on both you AND Julien. You're both a pain but I wouldn't want nothing to happen to one of you."

Mort ignored everything he said and whimpered. "I don't want the bear to eat the penguin!" The mouse lemur wailed, and one might say it was adorable.

"Penguin? What penguin?" Maurice narrowed his eyes and peaked around the crate corner. His eyes widened at the sight of a large bear-like shadow and a small little penguin shadow. All of a sudden the shadows kind of morphed together on the wall… _OH_. "Oh, I didn't sign up for this! I'm outta here!" The aye-aye ran out of the train without looking back, followed directly by a bawling little mouse lemur.

"I don't want to get sat on!" Mort screamed as he fled.

The two short lemurs ran as fast as they could to get away from the scene they had witnessed. Unnoticed by them, on their way from fleeing they also ran past the other three penguin's. Two tall ones battery ramming a smaller one's head into the side of the train.


	7. Drama

_Bear With Me: A Madagascar 3 Europe's Most Wanted fic._

_~M~_

A loud roar echoed throughout the train car as the bear snorted in deep satisfaction. To the small penguin in front of her it came off as a laugh at how she was able to finish before he did and the leader penguin scoffed, his feathers a ruffled and worn out mess.

"Hey it's not my fault you're like a hundred times my size and the pieces aren't working for ya! I've never done this with someone so brutishly behemoth before." Skipper said, and earned another roar plus a loving lick up his face. His expression softened and he smiled up at the female bear. "The feeling is returned. Penguin's honor." He said nobly. "Now let's get these pieces back where they belong, hm?"

Sonya roared again in response, sitting there while her tiny secret lover picked up the pieces, the chess pieces that is. They'd been playing a nice game of chess and the bear had a bit of trouble picking up the tiny game pieces.

Skipper put the chess set away one by one and folded the board back into the box. He held the box by his side under his flipper as he tiptoed up to kiss the bear goodbye on the cheek as she bent down to receive it. The penguin leader looked at her with desire and said huskily, "Same time tomorrow, my  _malicious mammoth._ " The leader bid her adieu and sauntered out the sliding train doors with pep in his step, starting to whistle. Today had been one of the best days he's had in years. It's not often he got to settle down with a nice lady friend, although normally his lady friends weren't over three hundred pounds but he knew he could handle it. He'd handle anything that heavyweight mountain of beautiful vehemence could throw at him. He'd handle it  _well_.

* * *

_~M~_

Mort cried as he ran and ran with his eyes closed in fear. The tiny mouse lemur ran until he bumped into something and fell back. He opened his large eyes to see two primates in a man costume. Since he hadn't really been paying attention to any plans or to what had been going on since they first left Madagascar, he didn't really register that the chimps were with the group or what a ring master even was, he screamed louder, cowering on the ground in fear at the fake circus masters' feet.

"I say, young chap. Please do tell me what's all this commotion about." Mason poked his head out of the bottom half of the coat disguise, looking down at the quivering lemur.

Maurice ran up, skidding to a stop and panting. That was so close! …And who knew that penguin liked things like THAT. That Skipper had to be psychotic to hook up with a carnivore! Then again, Julien did the same thing with the same bear… WHAT was he going to tell his majesty? Should he say anything? What if that crazy penguin sets that bear after them because they told what they saw? Aw man this was just all kinds of wrong and complicated!

"Ah, a fellow of wiser means." Mason commented about the royal adviser's presence. Now perhaps some answers could be given.

"Hey," Maurice greeted, still trying to catch his breath. His body definitely wasn't made for this running thing. "What's goin' on?"

"Well we'd like to know the same." Mason said.

"Oh, uh…" Maurice stammered nervously. That beast wasn't being sent after him, no way! He'd make sure he didn't tell NO ONE! "It's nothin'. We were just lookin for Julien. Can't find em in all these cars, man. I'm getting worried, ya know?" The aye-aye adviser looked left and right, pretending to be looking for the lemur king.

"Oh, well we- Ho, there goes your old boy now. He's looks to be in a good mood, don't you think?" Mason pointed towards the train.

There was King Julien, whistling a tune and with a pep in his step. The king had flowers in his hand as he climbed up into his beloved queen's train car.

Maurice stared. "Huh? Oh yeah, thanks. You can never be too careful you know?" The rotund lemur grinned sheepishly.

Mason exchanged a glance up at Phil in their suit who shrugged in return. Mason shrugged as well. "I suppose. Well it's actually a good thing we've run into you. We were told to spread the word of an important announcement had by the lion. Would you mind terribly in spreading the word? I'm afraid we've got to change suits. Speaking of, would you inform the suits of this endeavor?"

Maurice raised a brow. "Suits?"

Mason clarified. "The penguins, I'm saying."

The royal adviser sighed, hoping the chimp wouldn't say that. Just their luck too. How was he going to look those birds in the eye ever again after what happened? "Right, penguins, got it."

"We appreciate this incredibly so. Thank you!" Mason thanked with handshake and the two chimps in the disguise stalked off.

Mort was ecstatic to get to the king again. "KING JULIEN!"

"Hey, wait a minute!" Maurice grabbed the small lemur by its tail to snap Mort back like a rubber band. "We saw nothing! Ya got that?"

"We saw the penguin and Mrs. King Julien." Mort said, clueless.

"NO we DIDN'T. Alright Mort? I'm not being a snack because you couldn't keep yourself shut!"

Mort blinked but nodded. "Oh okay. We didn't see it."

Maurice nodded in satisfaction. "Good."

"But we saw Mrs. King Julien and the penguin."

"ARGH!"

Mort giggled. "Hooray Mrs. King Julien!"

* * *

_~M~_

The penguin leader finished his whistling as he walked in through the sliding door of the train car where his teammates were hanging around in. The private sat on a crate, absentmindedly swinging his legs back and forth, oddly enough having bandaging wrapped around his head and a black eye. The lieutenant sat next to the private with a neutral expression. The third penguin was twitching and holding a stick of dynamite for some reason, looking it over every few seconds with crazed admiration.

"Boys," Skipper greeted them with a nod.

"Hello, sir." Private welcomed his leader. "Did you have fun on your time out, Skipper?"

Skipper looked the youngest penguin up and down with narrowed eyes, looking over to the analyst sitting beside the private. "I thought this problem was going to be solved by the time I came back."

"The train wood to penguin skull ratio should have worked, sir. I might have miscalculated the angle of trajectory of the private." Kowalski said. "And there was an urgent matter of witnesses, Skipper, there was nothing we could do. Shall we try again?"

Skipper shook his head and waved it off, hopping up on the crate. "Nah, let's wait a little while longer. No one's going anywhere right? Leave it all be."

Kowalski narrowed his eyes, looking his commander up and down in deep thought. This continued for a moment before the lieutenant got his rushed conclusion and jumped the leader, pinning him to the ground in a very animated motion. "What have you done with the real Skipper, sir?" The lieutenant demanded.

"What the- Kowalski! It's me! Don't you recognize your own leader?" Skipper blinked up at him, trying to get up again much like a turtle stuck on its back, failing to roll himself over.

"Sorry, Skipper. You've startled me with your sudden views of consideration." Kowalski still looked him up and down but help him up nonetheless. A leader was a leader he surmised. The lieutenant's eyes stopped searching the leader when he noticed it, the ruffled feathers, the heated look, and the sudden consideration to top it all off. "Gasp! For shame, sir!"

"What?" Skipper asked. "What did I do?"

"Unruly feathers, passionate gaze, saliva and traces of food stuffs on the beak…" Kowalski listed as he used his flipper to swipe against his commander's beak. "You've been playing chess, Skipper! You've been found out."

Skipper rolled his eyes. "Alright, you got me. It was one game between friends."

"Friends don't share game pieces!" Kowalski accused, pulling the guilty chess set out from behind the leader's back.

"Hey! That's my property!" Skipper exclaimed.

Kowalski shook out all the pieces before throwing the board away and started shaking his commanding officer by the shoulders. "What have you gotten yourself into, sir!"

The leader shrugged sheepishly. "Best friends?"

"Skipper!" Kowalski scolded.

"Okay fine! I didn't know you were such a love-hating pansy, Kowalski! Why can't I have a little ride on the romance train, huh? I deserve it!" Skipper exclaimed.

"It isn't that, sir" Kowalski said.

"Then what? Why can't I have this?"

Kowalski pointed his commander in the direction of the passing by lemur king on the outside of the train. "I've identified the problem, Skipper."

"Twinkle-toes?" Skipper stared. "What about him?"

"Look." Kowalski instructed further.

The penguins watched as behind the lemur king came Sonya the bear, following the skinny lemur on all fours with a roar.

"Come, my queen!" King Julien called to his fat girlfriend. "Let us see what the freak has to say! Race you to Mr. Alex and his glossy bee-hived shaped head! Haha!" The lemur ran ahead excitedly.

"So, what's your point?" Skipper asked blankly.

Private cut in. "Julien's already seeing Sonya, sir. It'd be awful rude for you to just barge in and take her away." The private gave a hearty laugh.

Skipper narrowed his eyes. "Someone smack him please."

There was a slap that rang through the train car as the private rubbed his sore cheek.

Skipper smiled. "Thanks."

"Anytime, sir." Kowalski replied.

"So you really think I should just end it while I'm ahead?" Skipper then asked solemnly.

"It would be the right thing to so, Skipper." Kowalski nodded.

The leader sighed. "I guess you're right… who am I to come between young inter-species love?"

Kowalski put a flipper on his commander's shoulder. "We're all proud of your noble deed, sir. It shows true magnanimity."

Skipper nodded before the sudden rocking of the train car caused the penguins to look up in alarm as the tutu wearing bear climbed up into their wagon.

Sonya made her way over to the leader penguin before wrapping her large arms around him, nuzzling the flat headed penguin's body with her huge head affectionately.

Skipper smirked in his lieutenant's direction. "And who are YOU to come between MY inter-species romance? Ha! I say I'm going with this! And uh…there's a fly on Private's head again." the leader lied so the little penguin could get hit again.

Rico, with his unchanging crazed grin, smacked the private to the ground with the end of his dynamite.

Private lifted his head from the ground, looking between his leader and the bear. "Oh dear, well this is a turn of events."

Skipper narrowed his eyes, sick of the young penguin's inputs. "There's another one, I'm almost positive I saw it!" He urgently pointed, looking left and right as he did. "Right there…on his head…someone get it!"


	8. Going Back

Bear With Me: A Madagascar 3: Europe's Most Wanted fic.

~M~

" _Okay, wind her up, boys! It's Monte Carlo or bust!" Skipper said and called for a final count of their checklist. "Struts."_

" _Check." Kowalski replied._

" _Flaps."_

_The analyst tapped on the gas compass. "Check."_

" _Diamonds and gold." The leader said._

_Mason counted the diamonds, pearls, gold and emeralds. Phil bit down on a piece of gold._

" _Check!" Kowalski exclaimed as the plane started to take off._

" _We'll be back from our gambling spree in a couple of weeks." Skipper said over the loudspeaker "Or whenever the gold runs out."_

_Marty waved at them. "Bye-bye!"_

" _We'll miss ya!" Gloria shouted._

" _See ya later!" Melman called after them._

_Alex smiled and called back over the turbulence. "All right! We'll be waiting for ya!"_

_Skipper smiled his widest. "JUST KIDDING! WE'RE NEVER COMING BACK!" the leader and the rest of the penguins started to laugh hysterically while waving._

_Alex frowned. "Sorry. What was that?"_

" _Initiate warp drive!" Skipper ordered and the plane ripping through the air and possibly the time continuum because it disappeared in a twist of the clouds._

_Alex blinked after them. "Did they just say they were never coming back? Guys? …Marty?"_

_._

_._

_._

_._

Oh man it felt like yesterday that the penguins ditched them and left them alone to possibly die back in Africa. To think he thought they were actually serious when they said that! What jokers! Seriously!

Alex just had to laugh about it. They'd never do that! They were all friends, almost a team! They were close, all thirteen of them. Him, Marty, Melman, Gloria, Skipper, Kowalski, Rico, Private, Julien, Maurice, Mort, Phil, and Mason. They were all in this together, weren't they? Of course the penguins wouldn't just take the chimps and ditch them just like that!

It was a good thing they and the lemurs swam all the way to Europe just to see that. Well, swam would be an understatement for the lemurs. Maurice the fuzz-bucket had swam a good mile or so with Julien on his back and then Mort holding on to the lemur king's tail. Then of course Julien wanted to sit on him next, yeah that was REAL nice. The king just jumped right on his hair, putting his feet all in his mane and messing it up. Then, oh THEN Mort saw Julien's feet dangling and pounced for them. That incident ended in him getting a mouse lemur to the eyes as Julien lifted his feet last second. The fuzz-bucket adviser was beat from carrying the two younger lemurs and had to ride on his head as well, really just hanging from his lion ears to hold on.

So yeah, Alex didn't have a good time learning how to swim on such short notice and then being a flotation device for those lemurs.

Eventually they found a family boat and stole the floaties from there while the humans weren't looking. Well really Julien just saw the children with the floaties and wouldn't quick whining about having his own until the lion gave in and tossed him on board the boat, and then tossed Maurice and Mort up as the king's request. Mort landed on the king's tail, happily snuggling up to it while Maurice accidentally slammed into the side of the boat. He was okay though afterwards, sort of.

It took a while for them to come back out, a lot longer than it should but that was because those lemurs took a lot more than they were supposed to. They didn't even take the floaties instead they took the swan boat that was tied to the boat. They took the radio, a pinwheel, an umbrella, a chair, and oddly enough a bunch of illegal fireworks. Huh…

So together they made it to the Port de Monte Carlo. They made it up to the casino and placed the lemurs in the lower vents to get them to the control room while they, team Alex, got up to the larger vents on the roof. From there they caught up to the penguins and made their escape from that crazy lady.

Alex had some doubts about the penguins before, a lot really, but now he knew he had no reason not to trust them. They may still be completely psychotic in his mind but he found them less psychotic now and that was what he called good progress in their relationship. The penguins always helped them wherever and however they could which was just amazing.

So know he knew he had no reason not put their full gratitude in the birds because they were really planning to come back to get them when they had enough money. He felt kind of bad about cutting their gambling spree short but it wasn't like that would end up backfiring on them horribly. It's not like the penguins held grudges or anything. Skipper wasn't the type to enact revenge or just deserts on others, right? No he was almost positive that puffin Skipper mentioned wasn't really  _dead_. Those penguins were always joking around about stuff like that, right? They acted all psycho and crazy-like when deep down they were what they really were. Cute and cuddly harmless penguins, but just slightly more paranoid than usual. The penguins were completely safe!

But as he gave his announcement, he quickly realized that these circus animals weren't so much. They threw knives at him. Luckily they missed.


	9. Love in the Pantheon

_Bear With Me: A Madagascar 3: Europe's Most Wanted fic._

_~M~_

"We are meant to be together, you know." The king said, petting his hairy queen's head as they rode down the streets of the Vatican City.

The bear didn't respond. Sonya only pedaled her tricycle forward, making a right turn at an intersection of a path.

"Sonya?" King Julien called, trying to get her attention. He wasn't able to as they just kept riding down the street. The lemur king frowned. He had noticed his love's distance from him lately.

They turned down the street of Piazza San Pietro, 00120 Città del Vaticano. The couple passed by a beautiful colossal structure like that of the late Renaissance. It was none other than the St. Peter's Basilica church located within Vatican City. Not that they knew that. What did he know of geography?

He didn't see a famous landmark in front of them. What the king saw was a place resembling a palace. A palace fit for royalty. His queen deserved nothing but the best.

"In there, my love. Let us explore our hearts in our new summer palace I've picked out." Julien pointed and they rode into the golden and white structure.

How disappointing it was when he found out this palace was already taken by some gown wearing freak. He did have a nice ring though. Everybody there was kissing upon it. It was very gold and flashy.

So naturally he went up to pay his respects to the holy man as well, kissing the royal ring with wonder before sucking it off into his mouth and casually walking away. No one noticed this as the furry mammal couple left the church.

Once they were outside he popped the ring out of his maw with a grin. "Ha ha!"

This would do his girlfriend justice. Not justice for that man he stole it from but who cared about that guy.

Julien slipped the ring onto Sonya's fat and hairy finger. Her expression didn't change but he knew she loved her gift.

More strolling around Rome took place and eventually they found themselves at the Temple of Saturnus and Vespasianus. He didn't get what the big deal about it was. It was just a bunch of crumpling pillars and pointless columns that held up nothing.

They sat together on the steps, side by side leaning into each other. Or really he was just leaning against her prickly fur on her fatty side and she was sitting upright not paying him any attention, just looking out forward at the monuments.

The lemur king closed his eyes and sighed. He was in love, so much in love with this woman by his side. Nothing could separate them he thought as he snuggled alongside her.

"Oh Sonya, my one true love, let this never end…" King Julien mumbled breathlessly against her fish smelling fur.

But as he ran his hands through her stomach fur, Sonya took notice of the black and white wheels on her trike. It reminded her of penguin feathers and she roared for the first time in approval of the whole time they've been on their date.

The king thought the roar was for him and he latched onto her tighter, never wanting to let go.

Sonya roared again, but this time in annoyance. She got up and began walking away from her small lemur boyfriend.

"What's wrong, my love? Have I offended you?" King Julien watched her get up with a frown.

As it turns out, the bear had a bad itch that needed to be taken care of. Sonya found a column and leaned her back up against it, grinding her back against the pillar to put her itch at ease.

The lemur got up and followed her, putting his own back against the crumbling column and scratching his own spine against it. It felt good. "Oh yeah, this is feeling nice! Nice job, my hairy queen!" he praised her for her findings and resourcefulness but she just ignored him, continuing to relieve her back.

Julien found his itch relieved quickly and hopped down, taking his love by the paw and leading her away, the pillars tipping over behind her weight and taking every other one down with it, leaving it in a ruined heap. It wasn't really a big deal. Most of it was in ruins before they got there so they had no concern as they left another historical landmark in shambles in their wake.

Passing by the St. Peter's Basilica again on the trike, doves flew around them in the shape of a heart as the king danced on the handlebars in happiness. The king turned around on the bike to face the bear, grabbing her face and pulling it closer to his own.

"I want to kiss every inch of your huge head!" King Julien proclaimed and lowered his voice huskily as started to place a kiss to her lips. "It may take me a number of weeks…"

He was seconds from claiming his girlfriend's lips before they were sent unceremoniously tumbling down a dusty flight of stairs. The next thing they knew they were on the ground, the king squished under pounds and pounds of thick fat and fur.

Sonya sat up and looked around frowning as she noticed her destroyed bike.

Underneath her as he was once again allowed to breath, Julien was smiling at how close they had gotten.

"That was heaven." Julien grinned and just then noticed the whimpering of his lover. "Don't cry! Stop crying! It makes me cry to see you cry, my darling! I will get you something even better!" He bit his lip in anticipation, smiling as he had an idea. Only the best for his queen!

It was easier than he thought to trade in that old ring for a new and bigger bike for his beloved. The ring had tasted like knuckle

"Hey you  _can_ buy love!" King Julien said as they exited the motorcycle shop, his hairy queen more than eager to start riding the new bike pressed full gas on the pedal. "Whoa! Not so fast!"

They rode through the Vatican city, wildly and freely, doing wheelies on top of tables and people's cars. The lemur had never felt more alive than he had felt with Sonya.

Many days later they heard in the news of the same owner of that Ducati motorcycle shop being arrested for stealing the pope's signature ring. Sometimes you could never tell what evil lurks inside of people you've only met once in your life and for only a few moments. But as the radio report on those penguins' radio ended, the king only had one question:  _Eh, what's a pope?_


	10. Speeches and Crosswords

_Bear With Me: A Madagascar 3: Europe's Most Wanted fic._

_~M~_

"The other animals didn't pay much attention to me, Skipper." Private said, his head feeling better from before when the others where ramming him into the side of the train. He wasn't seeing stars or singing the candy man song anymore. He took those as good signs that he was getting better.

Skipper looked up from rearranging his apples but looked back down, ignoring the boy and hoping he'd take a hint.

"I think it's just because I'm not trying hard enough. What do you think, Skipper?" Private asked and got no answer. He frowned, watching the leader focus on re-positioning the pile of three apples. The private moved to touch an apple. "I can he-"

"NOT the apples." Skipper glared and dusted off the apple the young penguin just touched, going back to putting them in a row.

Private blinked and stepped away, very confused and a little scared. "Y-yes, sir…"

"Sir?" Kowalski walked up to the leader with a notebook to his chest and pencil.

"Yeah." Skipper acknowledged him without looking up.

"The lion should be giving his announcement very soon, Skipper." The lieutenant said with a curt nod, then frowned when the only response or clarification that he had been heard was just the adjusting of more apples. He titled his head in confusion, watching the apples be put into a row and then rearranged to the same line and then moved over again. It wasn't clear exactly what their leader was trying to accomplish.

Skipper looked up finally. "This look straight to you?"

Kowalski blinked and shrugged in response.

Skipper turned back to the apples, rubbing his chin before making the first one and last one trade places. He still didn't look very satisfied.

Kowalski blinked again but put down his clipboard and writing utensil, kneeling on what would be called knees for a penguin before starting to help in adjusting the apples.

The leader looked up and Private thought the lieutenant would be scolded for trying to touch Skipper's apples as well, but he was shocked to find that Skipper allowed Kowalski to help him. Now both senior officers were on their knees in front of three apples half their size and trying to arrange them to their liking.

Private's crossed eyes narrowed and he attempted to stomp out of the train car in what was supposed to be nonacceptance, his flippers grasping the door when it was slid open and he was carried along with it, slamming face first into the wood before sliding down into a barrel of water with a splashing plop.

Maurice walked into the train car through the door he just opened, the small mouse lemur Mort right behind him and in his own world. The mouse lemur's one tooth poked out over its bottom lip, very cute as he skipped into the train wagon.

Mort skipped past the penguins aimlessly, for some reason attracting the attention of the crazy penguin holding the stick of dynamite.

The penguin twitched and laughed psychotically as the small lemur's tail reminded him of the fuse to, you guessed it, a stick of dynamite. Rico followed Mort with a lit match, most likely trying to get close enough to light its tail on fire. This continued until they were off-screen.

Maurice the aye-aye lemur walked up to the penguins, feeling a lot of heat emanating from his own body. He really didn't think he could look at these crazy birds the same way again, at least not the boss one, not after what he saw. He could expect this type of thing from Julien. Julien was crazy anyway and he was used to Julien-type crazy. He wasn't used to penguin-type psychotic crazy! He didn't think he ever would be. It's not like he paid the birds much mind before, in fact he normally stayed clear of them. They did their thing whatever craziness it was and he did his thing, dealing with king-crazy mania who's over at that lion with the crazy hair's speech place outside of the train right now with that bear. The bear that just so happened to be the same bear this Skipper penguin was doing his own thing with.

Now he'd love to tell Julien what he saw and help the brother out or even confront the boss penguin about it, but again he was only specialized in Julien-crazy and not anything else.

Also anyway he'd let Julien have whatever fun he was having, you know just let the dude ride it out. He was sure this drama or whatever it was would pass soon anyway, and he liked to keep to his own kind. Not that he had anything against other animals really. It was merely a survival tactic.

Maurice only trusted other lemurs. That's how it was out in the wild and back on Madagascar. You trusted another species for even a moment and you were dead. You trusted a fossa, you're dead. You trust a psychotic lion and you almost get eaten, and as an aftermath you could be dead. You trust a penguin and they crash the plane with you in it twice in the span of only one year and you can end up dead. See, if you trusted lemurs you were cool and not dead or in horrible situations that can cause you to be dead. In the wild it was about survival. You had to be cautious in the wild. If you wiped for a moment you'd leave a scent and hey guess what? You're dead. It was a rough world but he always thought to himself that it was a wonderful one. You just had to stick with the way that doesn't end in you…(wait for it)…dead.

He'd tell the penguins about Mr. Alex's announcement yeah, because he gave his word that he would but after that he'd be outta here. Besides, he didn't think he could handle looking in the eyes of that Skipper dude. He's seen too much, and if those psychotic birds found out he knew one of their secrets who knows what they might do.

"Hey, uh guys?" Maurice started, the birds looking up at him with their eyes. They almost looked- "That lion with the big weird hair is giving some sort of announcement or something. Thought you'd might like to check that out."

The penguins looked up at him from the things they were doing, almost blankly and void of emotion. Now that he thought about it, it wasn't the fact that they were completely out of their minds of life-threatening with everything they did. Those birds liked to keep to themselves too.

The one with the crazy look and the dynamite looked up curiously after having been interrupted in trying to catch up to Mort to light the tiny lemur's tail on fire, his match still lit and smoking in his flipper.

The boss one didn't look up from the fruit, but the tallest one next to him did. For some reason the smallest penguin was nowhere to be found but everyone ignored the frantic splashing coming from inside of a nearby water barrel.

As he trailed Mort trying to light the small lemur's fuzzy tail on fire, Rico noticed the spluttering and frantically splashing barrel so he closed it with a lid next to his feet without much thought and continued with his match, following the skipping Mort's tail with it.

Skipper stared the gray lemur down for a moment before answering. He already knew about the meeting obviously, but they couldn't afford to arise suspicion by letting others know that they know what they already knew. One could end up dead that way. So he just shrugged. "Alright."

That was the end of the conversation exchanged and nothing more was said after that so Maurice awkwardly left with Mort whose tail had just been set on fire. It was obvious the mouse lemur didn't notice yet as he left.

The penguin inside the water barrel once again tried to get out of it, calling for help and shaking it. The barrel tipped over and rolled by Kowalski, Skipper, and Rico, but they took no notice and didn't really care.

* * *

_~M~_

"Well, you know what I say to that? I say they can take the animals out of circus, but they can NOT take the animals…out of the circus!" Alex said and only got confused looks from all the circus animals, including his friends. "I mean, they cannot-" the lion coughed to clear his throat. Man trying to give uplifting inspirational speeches was hard.

Standing on the crates off to the side were the four penguins, watching the speech with interest. Well not really. They were just waiting for it to bomb, and it did as far as they could see.

"He thinks he can convince a bunch of Z class act rundown performers to change their ways." Skipper scoffed. "I got two words to say to that lion…"

"Are the words good luck, sir?" Private asked, coming up close to his leader excitedly.

Skipper slapped him back into the lieutenant's flippers. "No."

Kowalski tossed the private away like a sack of flour. "Shall I help you come up with the words, sir?" the lieutenant asked.

"Okay." Skipper nodded, hopping down from the crate and onto the grass.

Kowalski pulled out a crossword puzzle as he and his leader began to look up words.

"Could I help find the words with you, Skipper?" Private asked hopefully, even wagging his stubby tail.

The lieutenant and commander shared a look and both agreed on the same decision. The two of them got up and walked towards the small bird, making Private frown in confusion with his crossed eyes blinking.

Alex went on with his speech, oblivious to the birds in the background. "I think you understand what I'm saying!"

"Yeah!" "Yes!" A chorus of circus animals agreed.

King Julien shook his head because he still didn't. "No!"

"We don't need  _humans_ because we've got passion!" Alex exclaimed. "What does a human say when he's passionate? He says  _I'm an animal_! Well we ARE animals! We'll make an all animal circus!"

Sonya roared in cheer, although it could have just been because she was a bear.

"Because if we follow our passion, we can go anywhere!" Alex exclaimed.

"Anywhere!" Marty shouted.

"We can do anything!" Alex continued, doing a back-flip up to stand on a colorful crate.

"Anything!" Marty shouted, dancing.

"If we do it together!" Alex finished and was met by chants and cheers. He smiled wide that he got through to the animals. No one was going to stop them from reaching New York! They could do this!

With everyone riled up and excited, chanting about fur power, no one noticed the smallest penguin being tossed inside of another barrel in the background . Nor did anyone notice the penguin leader and lieutenant dusting their flippers as they sat back down to search their crossword puzzle for words to insult that hippie lion with.


End file.
